A Parody on the Apple’s Neo’s components—old antiquated junk, hits the mark in this hysterical take down of the Neo which despite its humour, is spot on in the facts. Shame he didn’t go as far as naming the real price of the Neo outside of the US - $1000 equivalent in the EU/UK and $1400 Brazil.
The MacBook Neo may sell well, but that is not the same as being a good product. Beneath the cheerful colours and low headline price sits a more serious story about deliberate compromise, product segmentation, and Apple’s growing preference for control over user choice.
Apple’s rumoured $3000 foldable isn’t innovation so much as more unecessary iteration. After Vision Pro, Apple appears to be saying yes to another product that confuses technical possibility with user need. When self-restraint disappears, even great companies forget what their core product is for.
Jobs - the leader who vowed to go thermonuclear on Google’s Android, was replaced by a leader who now peddles the snake oil of “collaboration” as a strategy. Two quotes, two eras – and one culture that traded conviction for cowardice. Tim’s goose is now cooked by his own Greek tragedy of errors.
Apple has lost yet another senior Siri executive, this time to Google DeepMind. Yes, the same organisation whose Gemini models Apple is now relying on to prop up Siri. At this point, these exits aren’t noise, they’re alarms bells. But what exactly is on fire? Certainly not Apple Intelligence.
Apple just delivered another record quarter on the back of Jobs‑era hardware and services, yet still chose to rent Google’s Gemini for AI rather than ship its own, exposing a 15‑year failure to turn Siri and its vast device base into a genuine intelligence platform.
Tim of Oz pulls buyback and Gemini‑rent levers behind a curtain. Federighi meditates serenely amid failed “Siri 2.0” and “Intelligence” promises, and Safety-First Ternus, new“Product Bro”, stalks centre stage. Fifteen years of compounded strategic errors, finally come home to roost in 2026. #NotNeo
My Take: Apple’s Next Big Risk Isn’t AVP. It’s making John Ternus CEO. Nice Guy, Wrong Job.. But with misses in mixed reality, AI, smart home, autonomy and the iPhone Air, he’s the wrong leader for a company that’s arguably lost an edge. Apple needs fresh vision, not a hardware continuity candidate.
Apple enters 2026 priced on promises. There’s no progress. AI is still “next year,” AVP is already a value write-down, and the stock has barely beaten inflation in twelve months. Strip out the hopium and the 5-year chart tells a quieter, more uncomfortable story near term. Today: $256 @ the open.
Apple’s post-Venezuela wobble isn’t about Caracas, more about gravity. AAPL has overshot on Ives’ hopium, AVP is already priced as a write-off. The only level that matters near-term is $268. Above it: noisy optimism. Below it: stops, slides, and a reminder this is a value story, not a growth myth.
AAPL enters 2026 having delivered a 5% gain from December ’24 to December ’25: roughly flat after inflation. The narrative remains intact, the promises deferred, AI perpetually “next year,” and innovation safely iterative. Benjamin Button, but with a balance sheet. Divided Queens Rejoice!
LinkedIn’s AI “thought leaders” are multiplying like MLM recruits - all hype, zero insight frantic self-promotion. While they chase dopamine metrics, Apple sits silent, plotting 2026. This is what happens when the loudest voices in AI peddle fiction instead of offering insight.
Dan Ives waves the pom-poms again: robotaxis everywhere, “Apple to $5T,” and “Palantir to $1T.” Behind the hype sits the machinery, the pupeteers, rumours feeding analysts feeding markets while reality lags. This piece dissects the puppetry, not the cheer and does not mention the AVP.
At $272, Apple is being valued on an AI revival and a foldable that exists largely in rumour and analyst imagination. This piece explains why today’s narrative misreads Apple’s past decisions, misunderstands its current structure, and overstates what can realistically arrive next.
The Official “virtual twin” of Mark Gurman citing Tommo_UK as the mind behind Mark’s Apple analysis wasn’t on my 2025 bingo card. No satire here, just a screenshot doing all the work. Sometimes the truth lands funnier than parody.
News
You didn’t ask. It just knew. Because it’s been learning — not just from your words, but from you. Not Apple. Not Siri, but SenseOS - the AI Apple could and should have launched a year ago at WWDC2024, but didn’t. How about ‘25?
This article about Dan Ives frothing-at-the-mouth to out-vogue Amit from Evercore’s $325 PT, beating and raising it to $360, is the worst kind of hyperbole: dopamine driven irrational exuberance, which I will let ChatGPT explain, because, frankly, I can’t be bothered to write it myself.
Apple’s senior talent appears to be fleeing while analysts cheerlead from the sidelines. Evercore calls Siri 2.0 “real” as if that’s news, ignoring that Apple is now renting its AI brain from Google. This isn’t a comeback story but a leadership vacuum dressed as optimism, with pom-poms.
TOMMO.FYI
A quarter-century as an AAPL bull, a neglected rainbow logo. A final, unavoidable conclusion about Apple under Cook. It’s the piece I never wanted to write, but finally had to. This isn’t a usual tommo.fyi post. It’s an ASK. Before the article drops, I need a PDF/eBook designer. Can you help?
NVDA’s print has traders chasing a Santa rally while the VIX quietly sits in the low 20s, pretending risk is optional. AAPL’s climb-and-collapse should be a warning: blow-offs don’t end in celebration. If protection was a gift at 14, it’s still mispriced now.
AAPL’s five-day chart is a stumble down a staircase with no handrail. $272 has become the market’s favourite rejection zone where every bounce goes to die. Meanwhile CNBC cheers China’s ‘33% surge,’ quietly omitting that Beijing’s subsidies are doing most of the lifting.
Apple seems ready to replace Tim Cook with John Ternus. But with misses in mixed reality, AI, smart home, autonomy and the iPhone Air, he’s the wrong leader for a company that’s arguably lost an edge. Apple needs fresh vision, not a hardware continuity candidate doubling down on 5 years of misfires.
An exercise in making the case for a pullback to $225, unless, of course, Apple manages something genuinely new for a change. Let’s give hopium the elbow and stick to observable reality for now, though.
Apple’s $229 “iPhone Sock” proves the company can still out-parody itself, launching couture accessories while quietly shelving the iPhone Air. Culture, not hardware, remains the problem. From Vision Pro to Siri to Socks, Apple’s new product line is failure by design.